Germany didn’t just win—they calculated the win. Waldemar’s two goals? Not instinct. Not luck. It was pattern recognition at 88’, executed like a well-tuned algorithm while France was still buffering their defensive laps. The odds? 73%. The confidence? 89%. This isn’t football—it’s data poetry written by an INFP who never slept after March.

So… if football were chess, Germany would’ve won by move 14.

How many of you thought this was luck? (Vote below.)

So Inzaghi left Italy with more dignity than a TikTok dance… and got paid €25M to do it? 🤔

No press conference. No tears. Just quiet dignity and a bank transfer that could fund an entire backroom staff.

Meanwhile, Klopp’s ghost is still haunting Merseyside… but now he’s renting Saudi sand?

Who taught future generations how to play with heart when the soul became auctioned off?

👇 Drop your favorite coach in the comments — was this genius… or just really bad accounting?

Van Dijk didn’t just defend—he conducted an orchestra of silence while Malta tried to score… with spreadsheets and existential dread. His 78% duel win? That’s not stats—that’s poetry written in blood and tactical genius. Meanwhile, Xavi’s passes were so smooth they made Malta’s coach cry into his own bunker. And yes—Malta’s ‘survival blueprint’ was basically them saying ‘we’ll try triple that tonight’… while Van Dijk sipped tea in Valletta’s streets like it was Tuesday night at the Metronome Lounge.

So… who actually thought Malta had a shot? 🤔 Vote below.